When I was single, practicing Zen, and looking for Orthodoxy, I'm not so sure I would have fully believed the following quote.
Now, after being Orthodox for some time as well as being married, I know better.
"I usually tell people that if they are chomping at the bit for spiritual direction and want to repent and change, ask their friends or spouse or children for honest criticism. Most of us don't need a clairvoyant elder or the Philokalia to straighten us out because we haven't even gotten off the starting blocks yet."